Hook... Line...

Punk tried to give me money. A lot of it. He said he wants to "see me happy". Only a day after fucking me. 


I didn't take it. 


He keeps trying to give it to me.


New levels of being a screw up?


Is it paying for the past? Or purchasing a future?

There's a Good Girl

I saw Punk. We wined. We dined. We drank expensive wine. He paid the $450 tab. It was unnecessary extravagance. Wankery, really. He wanted to impress me. As though the $500 dinner would let him own me a little more in his mind. 


I dressed in a black lace dress, it's sheer lace over a black lace slip. The sheer black lace means you can see my shoulders and back and about half my thighs. The black slip covers the rest. A satin tie around my underbust accentuated my DD breasts. A white pearl on a long silver chain hung elegantly between my breasts to catch his eye. My black leather shoes were polished and shiny, and beneath my green panties and bra (matching forest green lace) were beautiful. Chosen to look beautiful against my white skin.


He escorted me out of the front door after some polite dinner conversation. There were some men watching me walk. Punk noticed. He put his hand on my ass deliberately in front of them. He pinched hard enough to assert that I was his. He let go, putting his hand on the back of my neck, asserting his dominance, I assume.


He walked me to the car, pulling a ticket out of the windscreen wipers. We'd been longer than anticipated.


We got in the car and drove. The rain came down hard. We drove most of the drive back to his place, between changing gears, he'd slide his hand up my thigh, pressing his fingertips hard against my pussy lips, occasionally wiggling it in against my clit.


We pulled into a drive through bottle shop, sitting in the car, he pushed the skirt of my dress up high while waiting for service. Suddenly he brought his hand down SMACK on my thigh. 


The red mark was instantaneous. The glowing heat was obvious. My right thigh was stinging. He pushed my skirt up a little higher, resting his fingers against my pussy. The man came to the car window and greeted Punk. He explained what he wanted, the man brought him the portable EFTPOS machine, glancing at my leg while he waited for the machine to process. Locking eyes with me, he wished us a good night.


Punk and I walked inside, I greeted his roommate warmly. I like Punks roommate. You can trust him. I always feel a little more at ease knowing he's around, as though if I screamed for help he'd come and rescue me. I lack faith that Punk will always control his limits perfectly, and that he could cross them at some stage. It's the biggest reason that I never would let him keep me.


He pushed me to drink, he gave me a drink. It was stronger than I realised. I was a little drunker than I'd have preferred. Not trashed, but my sense of pain was distorted, my sense of self, distorted. We got down the hallway to his bedroom. He untied my dresses ribbon, slowly running the zip down. He was standing behind me, kissing my neck, slowly running his hands down my back. He took my dress off over my head.  He spun me around, leaning me back and kissing me gently.  


He let me step back, then he spun me, pushed me onto the bed. He lubed his cock up, grabbed my hips dragging them into the air, pushing my panties to the side, shoving it into my ass. He fucked me for a little while, hand around the back of my neck, pushing me down into the bed sometimes when I moaned.


He pulled out, bit me on the back of the neck and asked me to follow him. I obliged. We showered together, he ran the soap over my body. The warmth of the shower was delightful. We stepped out, he sat me on the counter. My pussy is usually kept trimmed short. He pulled a new razor blade out of a packet, and began to carefully shave my pussy. He took his time. Occasionally touching my clit. He carefully parted my lips, shaving my labia slowly, allowing his fingers to touch my opening softly. The razor slid smoothly over my skin, he rinsed it in hot water, shaving some more. When he was satisfied he poured some water over me, then licked my clit softly. 


He picked me up and threw me over his shoulder. My ass exposed. He tapped it a couple of times and carried me to the bedroom. Dropping me on my back on the bed. He pushed my legs up, spreading them wide and starts to suck and lick my clit hard. He shoves two fingers in my pussy, one in my ass and pushed me to climax again and again and again. I pulled his hair, pulling his face into my pussy.


My legs shook, my pussy dripped. My hands ran through my hair. My orgasms were strong enough to make my body tremble.


He got up and flipped me onto my stomach, straddling my left leg. Holding the back of my neck in his hand, he guided his cock into my ass. Pinning my face into his bed. He pushed his fingers into my pussy, pulling them out, pinching my clit hard. Hard enough to hurt. With his fingers hooked inside my pussy, he started slamming my ass hard from behind. My cunt started to drip. My thighs were wet from where my pussy leaked. He pushed my face down hard into the bed again as I started to scream. 


He pulled his cock out of my ass and pushed it into my dripping wet cunt. He pulled my head to the side so he could watch me coming. He pulled his cock out slowly, then slammed it in hard. He shoved a thumb in my ass. Pulled his cock out of my pussy, shoved it back in hard. He pulled my hair up so I was up on my hands. He let go and pinched my nipples hard. Twisting them a little as I screamed he started fucking me harder. He grabbed my hair and started to pound away hard.


After a while I could hear him getting closer to cumming. pushed my shoulders down into the bed suddenly. He pulled out of my pussy, spread my ass cheeks, pushing the head of his cock against my asshole and blew his load all over it. He flipped a light on, admiring this cum dripping from my ass down over my pussy. 


Once he was satisfied, he rolled over. I stood up, let his come run down the inside of my legs and went to the shower and washed his come off me. He came in and shoved me against the wall, shoving his cock into my ass again. Pushing me up against the shower wall.


My breasts and face against the glass, ass pushed against him, like the girl in the picture. He spread my legs, telling me how much he liked my wet shaved cunt, fucking my ass. 


He slowed as I got closer to coming, waited till my orgasm backed off, then fucked me again. Over and over. Denying me release. 


"If you want to come, fuck my cock like a little whore" he instructed. "Come on, grind your ass on my cock" he teased.


I pushed my ass back against him and started to fuck him. He stroked my clit. 


"Come on Miss, fuck it hard" 


He kept his arm across my shoulders, keeping my chest against the wall so I could only work his cock by thrust my hips. I came hard. Shaking and moaning. He pulled his cock out. 


"There's a good girl" he whispered in my ear, kissing my neck.

Bruised Knees

So today Punk flew in. He arrived at the airport midmorning. I pulled my car up, Fleetwood Mac playing on the stereo. I pulled into the pickup bay, drove along and spotted him. Tight jeans, work shirt, sunglasses and a backpack. He'd traveled light.


He opened the door, climbed in, shoving his backpack into the backseat of my car. "Morning Miss" he greeted me. He looked me up and down. "You look good".


I turned and kissed him lightly and pulled out of the bay and started to drive towards his place. We sat in silence for a while. Him sipping a bottle of coke, I flicked through to a new album on my iPod. A put some Johnny Cash on, and as the songs about a pretty girl floated through my car, Punk squeezed my thigh. "I missed your smile, Miss" he said.


I flashed him a cheeky grin. We were paused at lights, waiting to turn onto the highway. He slid his hand up my smooth thigh, pushing my knee length dress up, stroking the outside of my panties. He reached over and grabbed my head and pulled my face towards his, kissing me hard. 


His fingers brushed lightly over my black lace g string, stroking my lips softly. I pulled onto the highway, Johnny Cash playing, my panties getting wet from the gentle stroking. As we hit the 100km mark, he slipped his fingers inside my panties, forcing one into my wet pussy. I focussed intently on the road ahead. Only 30 more minutes in the car to go. 


He slipped his finger in and out, brushing my clit gently. When things got too close to orgasm I touched his wrist lightly. I reached over and touched his hard cock through his tight jeans. I could tell he was ready to go.


I swung past to pick him up some breakfast from a cafe, then pulled my car into the driveway. We picked up our things, took them inside, setting our food down on the counter. We headed down the hall and he dropped his bag on his bed. I leaned against the wall of the hallway. He walked up to me, and grabbed my left hand with his, and pulled hard, causing me to spin. He pushed me, hard, between my shoulder blades so I fell a little forward, catching my shoulder on the door frame, so I was leaning against it, he smacked me hard. Over and over. I cried out and he kept spanking. He ran his fingers down the back of my g string, index finger hooked through. He pushed them to one side and unzipped his pants. He pushed down between my shoulder blades until I was bent over. He held his cock against my pussy and pushed in hard. 


He started fucking me hard. I leaned against the doorway, orgasms rolling over me. He grabbed my pony tail and dragged me back a step, then pulled my hair to the side so he could watch my orgasms roll over me. Halfway through an orgasm he pulled out and  looped his arms under mine pulling them back, slamming my chest into the wall. "Shouldn't have teased me while I was away Miss.".


He let go and walked to the kitchen, picked up the breakfast and ate on the couch. We ate slowly, chatting about the day ahead. We finished breakfast, allowing the TV to filter through re-runs of once-hit programs. He pulled me onto his lap so I was straddling him. He kissed me softly, lifting my dress and stroking my clit. He unzipped his pants, pulling his cock free, he lifted me slightly, aiming his hard cock at my wet pussy. He pushed my shoulders down, forcing me hard onto his cock, slapping my face, then spanking my ass hard. My already red ass cheeks stung, his repeated swats hurt. I was just pushing toward coming again when he grabbed my hair, and pulled it back hard. He whispered, his lips pressed hard against my neck "Alright Miss, hop off".


I complied reluctantly. I followed him to the shower, he stripped naked, and peeled my dress and bra off. I had a shower earlier, and had no desire to get wet. I watched him soap up and relax, I leaned over, resting my elbows on the counter. 


He got out of the shower and pressed down on my back, pushing my chest flat against the bathroom counter. He pulled my panties down, and pressed his cock against my still wet pussy, pulling away and pressing it against my ass. I made a noise to protest. "Shh Miss" he said gently. Pressing against my ass harder, holding his hard cock with one hand, he pushed... just opening up a millimetre. I moaned deeply and straightened my back a little. He pushed my face down, hand over my mouth. He pushed harder, I felt the head of his hard cock push through into my ass. I groaned with a little pain and a little pleasure. I tensed a little. He slapped my ass hard "Relax Miss" I tried to breathe as he pushed inside me hard. I gasped in and out. He started to fuck me hard. In and out, pounding away. He grabbed my shoulders and used them to fuck me as hard as he could. 


Suddenly he wrapped his forearm around my neck, lowering me down onto my knees on the floor of the bathroom. He started to fuck me hard from behind. "Come on Miss, I wanna hear you come hard" he instructed. I started to scream and come. My wetness dripped down my legs. He pushed my face down onto the bathroom floor, my knees moving on the wet tiles with each thrust. I was shaking and screaming and coming. He kept fucking me hard... unrelenting... the orgasms washed over me. I was just about to come again, and he pulled out without warning. He slapped me hard on the ass. I turned around, ready to suck his cock, or take a load all over my face. "Not yet Miss" he said. He patted my left cheek softly, I blushed.


We got in the shower, it took a moment for the water to run warm. He caught me under my elbow, and spun me and pushed me flat against the tiles. He pushed my chest into the wall with his arm, and used his free hand to guide my hips out so that my ass was pointing out, but my chest still flat against the wall. 


"One" he whispered. Forcing one finger inside my wet pussy. 
"Two" I started to moan. "You're getting wetter Miss" he said fucking my pussy with his fingers.
"Three" he whispered into my ear, and I felt a third finger trying to force it's way inside my pussy. Finally he worked it in. I felt tight and full. "Now, work it bitch" he said softly. I started to grind on his hand. I was moaning.
"Four" I gasped. He pushed shoved me harder against the wall, and I felt his fingers pull out a little. I felt his fourth finger pressed against my wet opening. I wanted to pull away. He pushed, it wasn't going to fit easily. He worked his fingers around, pushing them in and out, working the tip of all four in. Then he paused. The pause lasted for such a long time. Then he pushed hard. It hurt, it felt so good. I could have melted. He worked them around hard inside me. "There's a good girl" he whispered, and he pulled them out before I could come. He released me from being pinned against the wall. I gasped. He kissed me softly, running his hands over me under the running water. We got out of the shower and dried ourselves.


We ran a few menial errands, returning home after an hour or so's drive and a cup of coffee. We sat on the couch. Once again he pulled me on top of him. He pushed my panties to the side. He freed his cock from the constrains of his pants, pushing it straight into my pussy.


I was dripping wet. Desperate for more. Desperate to come again. Desperate to feel him come. I was kneeling, facing him, I started to grind back and forth on his cock, holding onto the back of the couch. He lay back and watched me. I was wearing my dress but he was staring at my tits, lifting my dress up from time to time watching his cock disappear into my wet pussy.


I rode him hard, I was aching, desperate. I pulled my feet up so they were on the couch and he could no longer resist. He grabbed my ass and was lifting me up and then pulling me down hard onto his cock. I was fucking him as hard as I could, my light brown hair sticking to my face, my breath ragged. He grabbed my throat hard, and with his other hand forced my hips down onto his cock. He came hard inside me. 


I kissed him softly and climbed up. He'd come a lot, and it immediately trickled down to my knee. I left him sitting back on the couch and I tidied up in the bathroom. I walked back and kissed him softly on the lips. 
"Thanks" I said in his ear. I picked up my bag and walked out the front door. He followed after me. I hopped in my car, started the engine, and gave a quick wave and left.

A Quiet Week And A Hectic Memory...

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A Hard Day

So this morning I'd made my mind up to move on. To stop worrying about Punk. Let bygones be bygones. Rather than throwing more good after bad, to let him wander away. I sorta resolved not to tell him this, to rather just smile and see what he'd say. 


After a month of up down left right and him saying all kinds of things to me, I realised that I'm not up for it. I can't commit. That I need more. Giving him my heart would be the metaphorical equivalent of pulling it out of my chest and putting it in a blender. 


So I went on my date with the guy I THOUGHT was an Indie doucher. Turns out, he LOOKS like an Indie doucher but actually isn't. An Indie I mean. He's just a douche. I listened and smiled ambivalently for two hours. Smiling politely. Thinking "Oh God say something interesting or shut the fuck up". We had absolutely nothing in common. 


I mentioned a movie I'd watched lately (Act of Valor) explained the actors were Navy SEALs. He looked at me with a look of "Oh suuuure". I made a Pulp Fiction joke, he looked at me quizzically and told me he doesn't like dudes (clarification: see the scene with Vincent and Jules discussing foot massages). So I made a Game of Thrones joke (given that he described himself as a "geek" I figured somewhere I had to get close, right?) he asked me who "Jeffrey" (ugh... Joffrey) was.


At that point I simply took a deep breath, realising that he didn't think I was interesting or amusing and asked him what he did like. I got the answer of "sport". Cool, I get it. Dudes like sport. I asked a few polite questions to enquire. I got very little back. I guess perhaps my jokes before that put him off? I don't know. He texted me tonight, he wants to see me again. I ignored the message for now - bigger fish to fry.


So, my very good friend has a drug problem, and is homeless. His folks chucked him out half way through his rehab program (awesome job guys). So I picked him up, bought him tea, gave him fifty bucks and took him to his friends place. Halfway through I was pretty emotionally drained. It was a tough chat. Never fun seeing your friend fucked up.


While he was eating and I was sipping on my decaf, in walks my least favourite fuckwit. So on my 23rd birthday, THIS doucher chucked a hissy, screamed "WHY CAN'T YOU SEE THAT I LOVE YOU" at me. I replied with "I can, I was just hoping it would go away". He decided we couldn't be friends, making shit fucking weird for all our mutual friends. He deleted me on Facebook, hung around my work, texted my friends and generally was a huge pain in the ass. Gossipy little cunt. Made for my very private chats with my friend with real issues to be actually really uncomfortable - more uncomfortable than your friend being a junkie. As if that's not hard enough.


While I was dealing with that breed of stupid, Punk texted me saying he's worked it out, and even though he's crazy about me, he feels like we won't work out. *bangs head against keyboard* Perfect. I fucking quit anyways.


And last but not least, and probably the saddest, I seem to have misplaced a really good friend. We were chatting heaps, and now he's not answered my emails or checked in online in a couple of days. He's a great guy, and I feel like somehow this might be my fault. He hasn't told me what the issue is, and I'd have thought he would. I'm more worried than anything else, and I just miss chatting to him. I don't even know if he's still reading my blog. Guess all I can do is hope. 


Some days are harder than others, but today life high fived me. In the face. With a brick. Hope one of you guys can say something to make me feel a little less like I suck at everything. 

Lets talk about sex...

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